


I loved and I lost you.

by Aldyce



Category: Shadowhunters
Genre: Bathroom Sex, Cheating, Drinking, F/M, Hand Jobs, M/M, Magnus doesn't have his magic, Magnus is married, Sad Ending, Week 5 : Forbidden, broken up Malec, post 3x18, sorry for all the pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-16
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-09-02 03:55:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20269597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aldyce/pseuds/Aldyce
Summary: How can i say this without breaking?How can I say this without taking over?How can I put it down into words when it's almost too much for my soul alone?I loved and I loved and I lost you.I loved and I loved and I lost you.I loved and I loved and I lost you.... And it hurts like hell.Hurts like Hell by Fleurie.Magnus tried to move on but it is hard to love when your heart is shattered. Especialy if it was broken by the one person you trusted never to hurt you.





	I loved and I lost you.

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [sh_ficletinstruments](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/sh_ficletinstruments) collection. 

> **Prompt:**
> 
> No one can ever, ever find out.

Magnus lay awake in the dark. His bed was cold, it had been years since he had shared it with his wife.  
Amber had been a brief distraction from his pain but he had never been able to love her as she deserved and their marriage had grown stale. He could never blame her for hating her, he had tried to move on but since that day, he could never love as he once had.  
Not only had he lost his home, his job and his power. He had also lost Alexander and ultimately, himself. 

That night Magnus sat alone at the bar, he emptied his drink and looked up to order another.  
That is when he saw him.  
A dark figure towering above the crowd. Dark messy hair, the worn leather jacket. Magnus would recognize him anywhere.  
"Magnus…?"  
He turned, his eyes meeting Alec's. It had been five years since he had seen the man. He looked older, tired but he was still the same man Magnus knew and loved.  
The man who had left him.

Magnus turned and walked to the bathroom. He knew Alec would follow. He closed the door and they were alone.  
Magnus could feel Alec’s breath against his skin. Instinct took over and he was suddenly pressing Alec against the door. He bit at the rune on the shadowhunter’s neck and relishing in the sound of his moans.  
Magnus knew Alec perfectly, knew just how to drive him mad. It had been so long and yet they fit perfectly together as if no time had passed. Magnus could think of nothing but the feeling of Alec’s hands pulling his hips closer, the feeling of his skin under his lips as he sucked at his neck and chest. His attention was pulled from his ministrations when Alec’s hands made their way from his hips and down the front of his jeans.  
Magnus’ head fell back at the perfect pleasure coursing through his body. He reached for Alec’s belt, desperate to see his lover come undone.  
The two men came together in each other's arms. They shared air as they came down from their high, neither quite ready to let go.  
Magnus pulled away first.  
“This never happened, I have a life now. I moved on. No one can ever, ever find out about this.” he turned back to face the man behind. He could see the saddest in his eyes, but also the acceptance as he nodded.  
“I’m sorry. I love you.”  
Magnus knew it was true, he had felt in the way he had touched his face, heard it when he had whispered his name. And yet it changed nothing.  
He had begged Alec to stay with him once. Now it was too late.  
“I do too. Goodbye Alexander.” without turning back he turned and left. 

His house was quiet when he arrived. Magnus lay in his cold bed and sobbed for what he had lost.

**Author's Note:**

> I will be writting an extended version of this that I will post after the authors are revealed so stay posted if you want to read more.  
Oh and sorry about the pain.


End file.
